drammatical

So we’re expecting some babies in time for Christmas. I’m sure most, if not all, four of my readers knew that by now… If not surprise!

With this news many ups and downs have been experienced. First and foremost N and I are ecstatic with our upcoming gifts. We really cannot wait, or maybe we can for the remaining five months. I personally have always always always wanted twinsies! I know I’m somewhat wrong in the head, but I did and well I’ve been granted my wish. I think I’m really excited to see what/who they’ll look like, kiss those little cheeks and just experience being a mother.

I have a very close relationship with my mom. It wasn’t always like that. We did not get along much when I was a cranky teenager and I’d been a daddy’s girl growing up. However, once I grew out of that annoying I-know-it-all stage we really connected. Anyway, I believe our relationship is the way it is because of our willingness to have open minds. Of course we don’t always see eye to eye on things but we at least understand and respect each other’s opinions. This is something that I cannot wait to share with my own children.

Something else that I clearly remember from my childhood is my mom always being there. She was a stay at home mama for the majority of my elementary days. After that she worked fulltime. Nonetheless I remember her being there and having that feeling of security that my mother would be there no matter what. Little A also got to experience the same thing and he too is close with our mom. This makes me sad about my little ones. They won’t get to experience that assurance. I’ve made the decision to continue working and have someone else care for them while out there…

So this is where the downs come into play. Many people in learning of my “situation” automatically assume that I’ll become a stay at home mom. When I clear this up for them they seem to give me a judgmental look. Heck some have even come so far as to ask WHO will watch them. Uh, none of your damn business! How will we afford TWO babies? WTF kind of question is that? Am I happy? Is N happy? Again I ask, WTF!? Seriously people what is wrong with you? But the most annoying is the assumption and expectance that I become a stay at home mom.

Why is it that in this century people are still hung up on women having families AND *gasp* careers? Is this still 19XX pre women’s liberation? I never have associated myself with being an ultra feminist but I am now being treated as one. People can’t seem to grasp that I have a *gulp* career and *sigh* no desire to stay at home… This of course is not to say that I don’t respect anyone staying at home to take care of their children. I commend and truly respect those women and men. I just don’t want to do it. Not my cup of tea. Kind of like when my father wanted me to become an LAPD officer and I looked at him like he was from Mars. Yeah, not me. So why then is there still double standards, expectations, judgment and just plan arrogance in 2009 with respect to women and children? Am I crazy to expect open minds? Probably.