drammatical

I'll skip why I've been gone for so long and just dive into what's going on.

The twins are now 13 months old and as adorable as ever! They call me by my first name, their version of it anyway. I swore I heard them say it a few weeks back and both my mother and sister confirmed it was indeed my name. Hmpf! Doesn't matter to me since they still know I'm their mama.

We purchased a house!!! I know right. We (I) never thought it'd happen. After two years of looking we found the perfect house that fits us or we fit in it. Currently we're getting it redone. Won't be living there for another 2 weeks at least. I'm hopeful that we'll be able to spend our first Christmas there. Here's to hoping.

I've started jogging again. I'm committed to at least 9 miles a week. Eek! So far so good except I haven't gone out this week. Must make it out tonight with the twinsies in tow. Smart me packed us all up so we'll be set to go after work.

What else? So much going in life at the moment. So much good stuff. I'm truly blessed for the family I have.

Alright so I didn’t do any type of training on Saturday… or any other day after that… So, hopefully the forecast is right and I’ll be seeing some stars on Saturday.

I’m also thinking about my options as far as workout times go… Currently I’m considering going for runs at 4:30am… and build from there.

I also started logging food in and strictly zoning at breakfast while semi-zoning all other meals. Snacks are usually zone and I’ve been focusing on protein and veggies. Trying to stay away from processed crap. Baby steps.

This is me owning up to it.

Saturday will be the start of Mt. Wilson training. If you would have asked me back when I was pregnant if I would partake I would have said yes right away… three months later this training, and all training for that matter, has been on the top 10 things I think about, DAILY. Even though I do not plan on racing I want to train. For my health, my mind and to have “fun” with folks I haven’t seen in a really really REALLY long time.

Not racing… Well it seems impossible to race. I nurse and will still be doing so by the time race day comes around. Then there’s the fact that we have TWO infants and ONE adult running the race already. I offered N the race this year and next year he promised it in return. So there it is, I’m not racing because I want to see my husband at the finish line with two well fed babies.

Training sucks, it’s hard. Yes, yes it is and that’s why I want to train. I haven’t felt “sucks” in a long time with regard to physical exercise. I need the feeling of wanting to puke again to know I’m doing my body right if that makes any sense. Also, I’m hopeful that this will gradually get me back to Xfit. At this time I only have one day, and that’s iffy at best, that I can actually go to the Academy. I’m not sure one day is even worth the effort, $ & time.

It’s Thursday and as of today I plan on being at the training, crying and all…

So we all survived Friday night’s adventure. Wow was that an adventure. It was so fun, challenging, exciting, everything but frightening.

There was snow, lot’s and lot’s of snow that turned out to be my Achilles heel. The cold air, high elevation, snow and steep hills were not a good combo for my lungs/breathing. I felt awful that my lungs suck and that I was holding my team back. Fortunately, I was teamed up with a group of awesome men that not only understood but helped me. They did nothing but encourage me and made sure my asthma was in check. Those guys were truly awesome and I couldn’t have asked for a better team.

We were down by about 1:30ish the next morning. This was not a 7 mile run. We were not expected to finish at 10:30pm as had been initially stated. I called N as soon as we got to Sierra Madre and he was asleep! ASLEEP! Here I was thinking that he’d be worried. Hmpf! He told me that he knew that we wouldn’t be done by 10:30pm, more like 1am. He also added that both Q and E had his number in case I would have fallen off the cliff or something…

Our team didn’t get lost but we didn’t take a turn we were supposed to and ended up backtracking. It was a 2.8 mile lesson. We also decided to take another route out of the mountain. Most of us had run out of water and that was a bit of a concern. We finished at Eaton Canyon and got a ride back to Sierra Madre. Honestly, the only area where I did get concerned was at the ranger station. There were these creepy looking cabins and then the guys were talking about lotions in baskets…

All in all I would so do this again, like next week if possible. This was a great Pioneer run!

Currently I have this lingering cough but other than that I’m feeling great. This is probably due to the rocks I didn’t step on when crossing the streams. No injuries and soreness so I’m ready for another week of life.

Tomorrow I’ll be doing a run through some trails in the dark with A, R and 21 other runners. We have no idea where we’ll start all we know is that we have a list of required gear and snow will be involved. End point is Lucky B’s, which can’t come any sooner.

Reasons why I signed up for this adventurous run:

Fear – I’m afraid of Mountain Lions. Also afraid of being out in the wildness at night. Since I’ve committed to myself to overcome my stupid fears I decided that I need to do this.

Fun – Believe it or not this really sounds fun! Not only will I be getting to experience something new I’ll be doing it with people that are dear to me. Plus, that Lucky B’s end point doesn’t sound half bad.

Comfort – I need to get out of my routine and zone. This is a sure way to catapult me in the right direction.

Experience – In my head I contemplate doing the Mt. Disappointment run. I’m NOT saying that I’m doing this, just considering it for the future, like three years from now or something. Since the race could take up to ten hours to complete there’s definitely some running in the dark, on the trails.

I feel that this run will help develop myself mentally. I need some of that. Physically I’m definitely not the strongest but I have an idea of what to do and what’s been holding me back. As far as mental challenges, I need some more.

Please pray to the virgencita that we all make it back in one piece, without any chunks missing.

On the 28th I turned 29. It was sad. Seriously. This will be my last year in my twenties and well it’s sad. I love(d) my twenties. Not afraid of getting older just afraid of what’s expected with it. I’m still trying to get used to the idea that I’ve become an adult. I think it happened a year ago. Getting married does that to you, make you grow up that is.

1. There is tons that I want to get done next year. Special projects and attend events and read, lots more reading. Hopefully my old book club can get its act together again…

2. Something that I really liked this year was meeting with friends at least once a week. I know we all have crazy schedules and I hope we can all keep it up, meeting.

3. I also cut down my spending, a lot. Want to continue that and hopefully I can cut back some more. Sure it was great on the pocketbook but really I don’t want anymore more stuff. There’s far too much stuff as it is and I want to cut my dependence on the accumulation of stuff.

4. I’d like to seriously start a library. Maybe invest in some early editions of my favorite books. Total contrast to what I just said up there I know, but these are books!

5. Also, I need to get my Spanish reading up to high school level. I set out this year wanting to read the entire Harry Potter series in Spanish and just never got around to it.

6. Well I will do it this year.

7. Must also finish reading all the books that haven’t ever been opened currently on our bookcases.

8. Take a vacation, again. After our awesome two weeks in Mexico N and I realized that was probably going to be our last vacation for a long time.

9. We are planning a big purchase this year, biggest one in our lives, so we figured we wouldn’t be able to afford one. Well nope, I think vacations are a necessity and I want to take one, again. Maybe somewhere in Central America. I’m even up to going back to Huatulco since we loved it so much with a trip to Oaxaca City first.

10. Must save my pennies for this one splurge.

11. Professionally I need to get my act together.

12. There are some certifications that I’ve been putting off that need to get done.

13. Also, I will invest more time in my career. Apparently this is what I’m going to be doing from now on, that’s a good thing.

14. Focus on health. No more chocolates, cheese, cracker, wine dinners. Getting far too old for that nonsense.

15. Will make breakfast a priority.

16. More intake of protein, both the animal and vegan kind.

17. Cut back on animal milk, must acclimate to soy.

18. Learn to say no to tias that force food on me, and my dad too.

19. Will look into ways to reduce my asthmatic episodes.

20. Goals that are up for next year include a mini triathlon with Shannon,

21. Mt. Wilson race time decrease with N’s help,

22. Rosarito Ensenada bike ride with my tia Chevy,

23. and complete the San Dimas AR with team Three.

24. Need to make sleep a priority. At least seven hours a day to begin with.

25. When tired, must rest. No more burning myself out to a point that I’m nonfunctional.

26. Be more kind and appreciative of people, everyone.

27. Act the way I want to see people act.

28. Help where help is needed.

29. Love more.

I took this post from here.

-need to find a decent watch for A.

-need help with dad’s gift. A Stetson is outta the question.

-have ideas for n’s gift, which always come way too late to pull off.

-thinking too much of pending anniversary of (my) year. And next’s too…

-I want to move. We may have an opportunity to move closer to parentals, even if it’s for a short time.

-need to call brother from another mother and reconnect. This relationship needs some love, from both ends.

-don’t want to celebrate bd, so please don’t bother people. Not being negative nancy but my bd sucks since well it sucks because of its timing. Bad economy and all, so nada! I’m only accepting home made scribbles.

-must practice my spanish skills as they are clearly deteriorating.

-make time for reading. Out of the 24 books I set out to read this year, only 14 have been finshed...

-----------------------------------------------------------------

I’ve been keeping track of all the days I’ve been working out since we got back to it. I did this back when I was training for Mt. Wilson, two months I logged everything I did and ate. What I didn’t do was log how I felt, physically and mentally. These past weeks I’ve been taking mental notes of everything and I think I’m ready to start putting stuff down on paper, again.

What triggered this? Well on Saturday N suggested [forced more like it] I go for a 5K. Ugh. I knew this was coming and well wasn’t looking forward to it. Recently I’ve decided that I’m going to push myself to the max when running, puke and everything, so yeah. Plus this route is tough, 50% upgrade. Did it…. in 29 minutes flat! That was a personal record for me. Plus, I really haven’t put in any mileage since, well since the ½ marathon. This really shocked me. Not that I could run that fast, for me anyway, but that I had improve my speed by not really focusing on running. Immediately I went over to the fridge to check out my workouts, three days of crossfit and one day of bootcamp every week for the past four weeks. Very promising indeed.

So apparently N has earned the right to chant “I told ya so.”

After a weekend of hibernation I was sure this morning’s workout was going to feel great. WRONG. Not only did I perform subpar I feel like I ran the Mt. Wilson trial all over again. My leg muscles are tired, my arms feel weak, my back can’t get out of its hunching over position and all over something hurts. Looks like the 3:1 isn’t happening this week. That’s okay though. I think I’ve been working very hard these last two months and as Coach E and Coach N have repeatedly told me, I must focus on the positive.

The plan is to take tomorrow off, BC Wednesday, try to make a CF session on Thursday and BC Friday. The ½ is on Sunday so Saturday will be a rest day. My goal for the race is 2:40. Originally I wanted 2:30 but I don’t want to beat myself up if I don’t get that number. Plus, after doing 10 miles on Saturday in 2.02 I think that an additional 3 miles is going to take about an extra 40 minutes.

Other thoughts… Even though I’ve been complaining about all of my shortcomings I am very proud of four very important people in my life that have all inspired me.

My husband N. Only after having knee surgery just two months ago he’s back at it. Plus, he’s better than most people I know! Always my biggest supporter and mentor. Never letting me down in any way and always pushing me to do better. He’s what keeps me going. He’s a true athlete.

My brother A. Who knew that dragging him out to a few 5K’s would have turned him on to BC. Every time I talk to him he has something to share from his class. It’s awesome to see how much he’s change in only a few months, both physically and mentally. Damn, he’s doing his first ½ this Sunday, then his first AR next Sunday THEN his first marathon in November. My baby brother kicks ass!

My mom. After all my hassling for her to get back to her walking and not excepting any excuses from her, A and I have managed to get her to her first 5K. This is a huge achievement for her and I’m very proud that she’s committed to it. I know this will be the first of many races to come. My mom’s on her way.

My friend R. Not only has she been a loyal BFF for many years this woman has always inspired me. I still remember when she dragged me to our first yoga class. Then I dragged her to her first CF class… The rest is history. R is on her way to becoming an elite CFer.

I’m still working on a few others but I’m sure I’ll get them to come around eventually…

Been in Atlanta, Vegas, training and now back at some more training. Sheesh seems like I no longer have a desk, which can be good and baaaaad.

Atlanta was hot. It made all of my allergies and asthma flare up and still am suffering from them. Not good. I did manage to eat right although I wasn't necessarily on the Zone but I did always manage to get some protein in at each meal.

Vegas was awesome. No more on that. >:)

Training is going great, learning tons of new stuff and can't wait to actually use these new skills.

Now for my other training. New Fall Bootcamp Cycle.

Week 1
Mon 9/15: Recover from Atlanta/Vegas
Tue 9/16: 5K run Time-30:19
Wed 9/17: Bootcamp 3 Razorback Repeats Time-last person down
Thu 9/18: Rested, legs and feet were both swollen and in pain.
Fri 9/19: CrossFit 5 rounds of 5 pull ups (jumped), 20 sit ups, 5 push ups, 10KB swings (green one) Time-16something last person that did this workout.
Sat 9/20: Woke up with painful feet again and skipped out on the 5K I had planned on doing. Attended a wedding and got some cardio in during the reception.
Sun 9/21: Chantry Flats Loop 5mi. Time-1:20+? Asthma was tough

Week2
Mon 9/22: Bootcamp Squats, bear crawl, crab walk, push ups
Tue 9/23: CrossFit 20 minutes of 10 medball cleans (16lbs) and 10 push ups Rounds:8

So I have 13.2 miles to run in a couple of weeks. I'm both excited and scared but mostly scared. I'm not sure I'm prepared. Plus, I've never gone that far so I know its 75% mental and 25% physical that's coming into play right now. In preparation for this big deal I'm trying out the 3:1 schedule. Today was day 3 of this new plan/torture. Feeling really tired but I don't know if its from all the sneezing and congestion that's been going on to really bad allergies, cold I may be getting from N or just plain stress from work. I'm really, really, I mean really looking forward to my rest day tomorrow. I think I may actually snore tonight.

Also really afraid on how my quads are going to feel too.

So I did the ten miles on Saturday, four on Monday and now I’m up for two 5K’s today. Daunting.

Also, I’ve managed to successfully stay on the Zone 75 percent of the time since Tuesday. Really can feel the difference even though N was making fun of me last night accusing me of drinking the so called water. Hmpf! Little does he know he’s been Zoning too. Hah!

So the only problem I’ve come across is bread. I love the stuff. Not white bread or table bread. Not that nonsense. I’m talking about chocolate muffins and banana walnut loaves bread. Especially with coffee… Damn you bread. Other than that it’s been good times. Then there’s that little bit of wine I had on Sunday, but, I did manage to offset it with some cheese full of protein.

I’ve also been lurking on The Zone’s boards and must admit are quite helpful. It’s reassuring to know there are others with the same thoughts and feelings when it comes to The Zone and food in general.

Something else I’ve been thinking about seriously is adopting the 3:1 schedule. It’s all about getting back to consistency and dedication. I did do those last things before and saw results, I guess they do work. Just guessing here.

Crap, I think someone’s slipped me some of that water after all. #%$%*)!

damn. missed the am bc class yet again. seems that mornings and me don't mix very well this week.

all i want to do is go home and crawl into bed. what i will do is force my ass to bc with aa and suffer, tremendously i'm sure. crap.

well at least i've managed to successfully stay on the zone all day. hopefully this mere fact will help me out tonight.

thanks e for keepin' it real.

-
1. Really upset at my current weight.
2. Want/Need one of those fancy cameras everyone seems to have.
3. Mad at self for jumping on first bandwagon ever, see above item.
4. Scared about running 13.1 miles. Hell, scared about running 10 miles.
5. Trying not to bite my nails, awful habit I know.
6. Work is really so easy but so hard to focus on.

+
1. Made appt. with graduate advisor to finally finish degree.
2. Really psyched about going back to school.
3. Thinking of possible thesis options.
4. Getting a haircut finally.
5. Spending some time with mom this weekend, finally.
6. Got to see A-II last night!
7. Cube-mates are super quiet. Wait.
8. Only two more hours and I’m free from here.

Man oh man it’s only 10:30am and I’m exhausted. I knew I should have called in sick today.

So I was rereading all of my posts for this blog and realized what a big downer I truly am, sheesh. Seriously, all of my posts are rants and vents about how bad this or that is. Well I’m not like this IRL so this is where all the garbage gets dumped at. Kinda nice to have this little place to b!tch. Anyway, I’ll try and be a bit more optimistic in future writings, although, I do take pride in my self professed cynicism.

On to good stuff…

Both N and I ran a 5K on Saturday that was sponsored by our little town. It was such a great day as the weather went. Even though neither one of us wanted to get out of bed and were totally late to this thing we actually had pretty good times, as in numbers. I was able to break 30 min and came in at 29.46, unofficially. N came in at 25.09, which he was totally upset about. He said he could have done a lot better and was really hard on himself. I would so be elated with that time but alas it wasn’t. After the race we met up with our team for some drinks at a local Mexican restaurant. Good times, good times. Beer and tequila shots aren’t really recommended after a run but hey we like to live on the edge. We didn’t get home until 4pm and then fell into a drunken slumber. Needless to say I wasn’t feeling so good that night. I had fun so I totally didn’t mind the mind numbing pain.

Yesterday I went over to my parents’ for some lunch and cake. My sis’ little monkeys were all there in full force. Its really crazy to see how much they’ve all grown, hell two are teenagers already! They are such cute little rascals and even though I tend to lose my temper with them more frequently then not I wouldn’t change a thing about them. Well maybe one.

We also went to the Rush concert in Irvine. That concert was rad! The fans were really something else! We were joking about how scary they were. Total rockers. This is the second time I’ve been to this venue and I really appreciate being outside. The cool breeze was so refreshing and invigorating. Too bad there aren’t any concerts I’d like to attend at the Greek anymore.

All in all, it really was a fantastic weekend.

It's 10:30 PM on Sunday night and N has gone to work and I'm supposed to be working. Eh! Can't concentrate though. And what is it that I do when I'm trying to avoid work? Yes, correct, surf the web. I can finish up writing those Christmas cards or order the prints we need for our gifts but that just does not seem interesting enough. Plus I may be away from the wonderful work of www since tomorrow I'll be going to court for possible jury selection. Another eh! This would be something I'd really be psyched about if I didn't have a million things on my plate right now. Guess that's the ways of the world though, nothing comes at a convenient time.

What I am psyched about is this blog I stumbled onto. Haven't read it all but a six month trip, six months off, a six month sabbatical! This sounds like my cup of tea, definitely. So, if you had six months off your lives where would you go? For us its pretty easy, all over America. Might sound boring to some but not to us. We both are very interested in visiting all of South and Central America. We want to learn more about our culture, our people, our history. Other than Africa, most of the Americas remain untouched by industrious powers. To go and walk among amazonians, to see machu picchu, marvel at the highly adapted creatures found nowhere else but Galapagos, I can go on and on.

The funny thing is that the Americas are so unappreciated. The land is so full of life and culture and love. Both N and I have talked about our future, once we get to the stage in our lives when our not-yet born children are outta the house and we're up for retirement. We both agree that we plan on moving on from this place and onto Latin America. Why not? We speak the language, know and respect the culture and to boot we too are Latin American. For now though we must work hard in order to make this dream a reality. So alas I better get my behind back to report writing.

I feel so restless. It is so beautiful outside that all I can think of is anything but work. These windows behind me are only fueling my desires to leave already. Hell I may even make a trip to the SB across the street just to get out. Plus now that I'm bored I want to eat. Something with chocolate.

Alright, in order to distract my brain I'll just continue to rant. Since the New Year is looming and I'm sure everyone will be making resolutions I think I'll share my goals for the month. See I don't make resolutions. As a matter of fact a friend pointed out that NY resolutions are an urban legend, I must agree. Anyway, because I have to talk myself into almost everything I do I started, many moons ago, to make little lists of goals. Sometimes I make lists for each day, a week, or even a month. For December I've already drafted a list which of course is subject to revisions (many I'm sure). Here it is:

1. Jog/ workout at least 5 days out of the week - so far I got 2 days in.
2. Must finish reading eat, pray love
3. Must start and finish The Memory Keeper's Daughter
4. Allowed only 5 trips to SB this month
5. Make dinner at least four nights out of the week
6. Get xmas tree before the 9th
7. Mail out xmas cards by the 5th
8. Refrain from getting annoyed at idiot people, learn to relax
9. Seek volunteering opportunity at church
10. Kiss N every night before I go to bed

Yes, its sad that my poor N had to remind me of the fact that I don't kiss him every night before I go to bed. Sometimes I just lay down and that's it, I'm a goner. We also want to get a xmas tree sooner than later so we can enjoy it longer. As for not getting annoyed, that's going to be a tough one. I'm already starting to get a tad annoyed... And books, man do I have a lot that I haven't read just sitting there on our bookshelves. Yes, no more buying until I read em all. What's on your list*?

*Just pretend you have one please.