drammatical

Wow. It truly has been quite some time.

I’ve been focusing on the twins, my husband, our dog and myself. These seven months have really flown by. Everyone that has kids always warns you about how fast it goes but you never get it until you experience it for yourself.

The babies are the most amazing thing that has ever happened to us. They have taught us so much about ourselves. Every day is a real blessing.

My husband has started his training back up again. He has been a real inspiration to me and is always my motivator. I still cringe when he tells me his WODs even though he reminds me that I once used to do them too. ::shudder::

Miffy has been great with the babies since day one. I love how she has to greet them whenever we get home. A lick for each one. She has also become very close to N now that my primary focus is on the twins. I do miss how close we were but am grateful for that time.

I have been working hard on keeping my family healthy. Also, working full time, nursing full time, mothering full time, wife full time, etc… keep me very very busy. Reading was such a pleasure and now a luxury. I’ve picked up some new books and have started reading again; hopefully I’ll get to finish three books by year-end. Running has also become a priority for me. I’m sore everyday and curse the start, middle and end of my run… the best part is when I’m in the shower. Agh, all I want is to slowly get myself in better shape. Races and xfit really seem daunting at the moment. I am hopeful that I’ll get myself back sooner than later.

Alright so I didn’t do any type of training on Saturday… or any other day after that… So, hopefully the forecast is right and I’ll be seeing some stars on Saturday.

I’m also thinking about my options as far as workout times go… Currently I’m considering going for runs at 4:30am… and build from there.

I also started logging food in and strictly zoning at breakfast while semi-zoning all other meals. Snacks are usually zone and I’ve been focusing on protein and veggies. Trying to stay away from processed crap. Baby steps.

This is me owning up to it.

Saturday will be the start of Mt. Wilson training. If you would have asked me back when I was pregnant if I would partake I would have said yes right away… three months later this training, and all training for that matter, has been on the top 10 things I think about, DAILY. Even though I do not plan on racing I want to train. For my health, my mind and to have “fun” with folks I haven’t seen in a really really REALLY long time.

Not racing… Well it seems impossible to race. I nurse and will still be doing so by the time race day comes around. Then there’s the fact that we have TWO infants and ONE adult running the race already. I offered N the race this year and next year he promised it in return. So there it is, I’m not racing because I want to see my husband at the finish line with two well fed babies.

Training sucks, it’s hard. Yes, yes it is and that’s why I want to train. I haven’t felt “sucks” in a long time with regard to physical exercise. I need the feeling of wanting to puke again to know I’m doing my body right if that makes any sense. Also, I’m hopeful that this will gradually get me back to Xfit. At this time I only have one day, and that’s iffy at best, that I can actually go to the Academy. I’m not sure one day is even worth the effort, $ & time.

It’s Thursday and as of today I plan on being at the training, crying and all…

I just am. My issue(s) is/are that I want to do it all, ALL. No one can do it the exact way that I want it done therefore I don't bother asking anyone to do it, any of it.

We hired a housekeeper and already I want to get rid of her. She's just not fulfilling my expectations. I find myself cleaning again, after she's done it herself. The point was to free up my time not make more work for me...

Food. My god it has been a disaster. I was eating so good and healthy before I had the babies. Now... ugh! Really need to organize myself and start cooking again. I'll even freeze meals if I have to.

Work. Is taking its toll. Luckily I'm not going in to downtown but still have a commute. Then there's the two week long trips I have to take this summer. I'm stressing for N.

Housing. Yes we're still looking but there is absolutly nothing out there that fits. So fuckingfrusturated about this one the most.

Me. I have so many outstanding appointments and giftcards. Need to make some time for me. Also, I miss xfit. At the moment it just can't work, financialy and schedule wise. *sigh*

Who knew that being a mom was so much work... har har har.

Well we're finally getting into a routine but with the holidays here it's been super busy plus I'm back at work. Also, I'm starting my running again. So far I've been out twice a week for the last two weeks. This is a BIG accomplishment for me. Can't seem to leave my little babies!

For now here's something to enjoy until I get back to blogging for reals. Looking at this pic you would have never guessed that those little chubbies were born at 33 weeks. They're 8 weeks now.

The babies came home on Monday evening. This is day three and we've already settled in. I must thank the awesome nurses in the NICU unit for doing such a great job with my babies and establishing a schedule for us.

N is on vacation next week and it will be so nice to finally have all of us together without having to think of work. Also, I'm planning on attending a baby shower that I'm cohosting on Saturday so N will be alone for a bit... The babies are so good on their schedule that I have no worries. Neil on the other hand...

I've been feeling great, just short on sleep. Everyone says to sleep while they sleep but that's easier said than done. There's just so much to do. Also, I really can't wait till I get the okay to start running again. Yes, I want to run. Because I had an emergency c-sec I have to wait till I see my doctor in a few weeks. It's not about weight but just about the feeling I get when I run... well afterwards when I'm done. Honestly I think that I'm very close to my prepregnancy weight. My belly looks like it did before babies, a little round. ;-p Not like I was a small girl beforehand.

We're just enjoying our little babies and can't believe how much they've already grown and changed in these past two weeks.

I'll post official later, no time now.

We're all doing great. Babies need a few weeks in the NICU but they're doing awesome already!

Baby A Girl - 3 lbs 14.5 oz and 17 inches
Baby B Boy - 4 lbs 11 oz and 17 inches