drammatical

Back from Vegas and didn’t participate in as much debauchery as I had intended to. Oh well, there’s always next time. Plus someone owes me a trip and they better well make good on it!

I’m also broke :’( Kept to my promise to eat healthy. Unfortunately, I think I made up all the calories somewhere else...

Best part of the trip – Mesa Grill
Everything I had was delicious! I’ll post some picks as soon as I get home. Plus, they have some good damn mojitos to boot too.

Worst part of the trip – Accidents
We saw two really bad accidents on our way and back from Vegas. Both cars were flipped over on the side of the road and had just happened when we passed. Why oh why do people go so fast. I’m really thinking about them all and hoping the best for them.

Now I’m back to regularly scheduled programming. Blah. I’ll be making another rare appearance at bootcamp tomorrow morning. Hopefully I’ll be able to get a run in tonight and then I’m planning on another Sunday with the locos running the marathon. Monday is back to the grind up north. I’m thinking I can probably finish this assignment by the 18th and see if I can get back into my habitual bootcamp schedule. Here’s to some positive “lemme-finish-up-this-shit-assignment-fast” vibes.

I’ve been feeling sorta very crappy. Still haven’t been able to recover from the trail race. This really sucks too because I’m really feeling the guilt mounting up.

I went for a run on Friday what N and I have deemed the “mansion run.” This sucker is nothing but 3 miles straight up hill. The first 1.5 is decent but the remaining 1.5 is brutal. So I went on my own. At 10am. Ugh. This was a bad idea and I knew it before I even got my shoes on. The heat killed me. Surprisingly I felt great and was able to run 2 miles nonstop out of the 3, something I have never been able to do. The sun was just too much so I had to stop. Then being the smart person that I am I took a longer route back home. Another stupid idea. All in all the loop was a little over 6 miles and I was not doing so good once I got home. Needles to say I never made it to the trail run on Saturday with some of the workout buffs. I’m sad about this. I’m really hoping my diet change will kick in soon to make me feel a little better. My plan is to do something tomorrow, no matter what.

N’s little sister graduated from college on Saturday! We’re so proud of her. It was crazy hot though and I swore I almost passed out twice sitting out in the sun. I’d do it again though, it was great to see how much she has grown over the years. Love you sister-drammatical-J.

In other related news, my little brother is also graduating, from high school. He'll be attending college this summer. So, in anither four or five years we'll be at another grad. Love you little A.

Congratulations to all the new grads!

I'm going home tonight! Hopefully I can leave early enough to make it to a CrossFit session. I haven't done squat except walk to and from my room, from car to SB and back, and walk the 5 steps from my car to the office I've been working out of. Oh, and I've made it a point not to go anywhere that has a drive-thru. I've had to walk to get my food too. Although most places now offer curbside deliveries... But nope, not for me. I feel surprisingly guilty and really physically ugh. Damn it, who knew this would ever happen to me. ME!?

So excited that I'm going home though! WooHOO! We have a nice weekend ahead and I really can't wait. Working sucks, even more so when you're shut off from your little world.

BTW, workout buffs, what does AR mean??? My guess is that it has something to do with pacing? Please ‘splain.

Don’t really have any down time during the day but I have a bunch of stuff in my head.

First, I can’t believe all the stuff I’ve been eating. I’m really getting scared. My hunger has yet to be satisfied which is not good. This all began after the race. I’m not sure what’s happened since then. Understandably, Saturday and Sunday seemed normal but its Tuesday now and I’m still feeling like a starved child. Plus I feel weak and tired. I’m seriously moving at very slow speeds. I made it a point to really be conscious of my eating yesterday and have made some painful, on my part, but smart choices. All I can say is that being on travel status doesn’t help one bit either. Skipping breakfast yesterday and today hasn’t helped the issues either. Hopefully by keeping tabs on myself this appetite will pass. I really don’t think I can afford more pounds.

Second, my career is really starting to annoy me again. I’m constantly going through this. Anyway, I’m not planning on switching this late in the game but just need to vent. My first year with this company, I was away for about four months on an assignment. Sure it was exciting but I was much younger and not married. Last year I was also away for about half the year. Actually, I was sleeping out of my bed for approximately 23 weeks. Ugh. I’m really lucky to have such an understanding souse but I’m really tired of all this travelling. Plus it really annoys me that all the singletons in the office have been cruising on local assignments. Seems like all the married staff is away which is bullshit. There’s a close cw that was away since September of last year and just got back! AND she’s now getting ready to leave again in August for another painfully long tour, with me. She’s also married. When I took this job I did so knowing that it entailed travelling about 25% of the time not forty-fucken-four!

Which all gets me to my last thought, babies. Seems like we’ve been getting hints about this more and more now that we are approaching our second year of marriage. Plus we are somewhat older but not so much so that this is an issue. Anyway, we have talked about this on many an occasion and we’d really like to start a family within the next two to three years. Which brings me to my job… I have a ton of flexibility here, when I’m not travelling, and this place would be ideal for any parent; however, the traveling is something that cannot really be avoided. So then what? If I pursue another company/ profession I would feel unprofessional and unstable having a family right away, at least within the first three years. I also want the flexibility during the first few years of our future baby’s life. It really is unjust that women have to deal with issues such as these in today’s workforce. So that’s my dilemma. Baby or career?

And today’s WTF moment:
News anchor was doing a piece on the salmonella infected tomatoes and warning people about which ones not to eat and which are okay…

“The tomatoes grown at home are okay to eat folks.”

Are people really this stupid that you have to tell them that the tomatoes in their backyards won’t kill them!? Seriously? Seriously! Seriously.

The race is finally behind us. Phew. We all survived and did pretty well for our respective abilities, except for me. I was disappointed with my performance. Even though I improved from last year I didn’t hit my goal time. I’m really looking forward to next year’s race. I’m really obsessed with achieving my goal. Next year I promise to keep away from all dairy products too.

My time was 2.11, improved 8 minutes from last year.

N did awesome. For not training as hard as Hotbod and myself he really kicked some arse. Plus, with his bad knees and all the downhill really got him. I'm so proud of him for making the effort to come out and run even though it was very painful for him.

So now the next big race on the docket is a half. Hotbod has been harassing me to do one with her. Last year we had agreed that we were going to complete one together but I ended up flaking out on her. This year I’ve promised to fulfill my pledge. According to the training schedule I got off the net we’re supposed to start training already for this thing. Still don’t know what my pace should be either. At this point my goal is completion while keeping a steady jog.

Also, while having some drinks after the race on Saturday someone asked me about adventure racing. I’ve secretly wanted to participate in these ever since I heard ‘round the water cooler that some of the workout buffs do these. My only concern is that I am not as physically fit as the rest of the gang. Someone else told me that I should find a team of my like abilities but I really don’t know how to go about this. Hotbod is really interested also and I’ve already told her that we have to be on the same team since we’ll average out as normal, her with xtra endurance and me with not-so xtra stamina. We’ll see I guess.

Well I’m still suffering from my toxic yogurt incident. Have been feeling like shit all week long and today is no better. This totally blows with the race being tomorrow. Oh fucken well, I’ll walk the damn thing if I have to.

Also, I’m still not in very good spirits. Better than Monday that’s for sure, but not me, yet. I’ll be leaving Monday morning and I’m really dreading it. We had a meeting with the group I’ll be working with up north and they seem to be okay, for now. It always starts this way. I’m sure come next Friday I’ll be complaining about all the crap they’ve given me. Blah.

Books. I love reading and have been on the Obama book forever. For some reason I haven’t really made time for it but am happy to report I’m only 30 pages away from the end. Even though I’ve toughly enjoyed the book I can’t wait to be done and start something else. My next pick is a bit of a fluff book but that’s what I need right now. Emily Giffin’s Love the One You’re With. I picked this little gem up at Costco since I’ve become obsessed with buying books there. Anyway, I totally loved her previous three books and writing style. Although, I must admit that Baby Proof was somewhat disappointing compared to Something Borrowed and Something Blue. I’m looking forward to devouring this book next week. I’m also secretly looking forward to doing nothing but laying down next week. I think I’ve earned this little break.

So I totally got food poisoning from the yogurt I ate yesterday. I knew I shouldn’t have eaten it but I was hungry and it was either that or go downstairs and get a bag of chips. For once, I think the chips would have been the healthier choice.

After CrossFit last night I felt really strange, hell even before the class began my tummy felt weird. Anyway, I attributed it to my sour mood and a slight caffeine overdose. Wrong! I knew my nausea was not the normal crazy workout kind but figured I’d be okay. I had a headache, body aches, fever and chills and felt like I was going to die. The good thing was that I never threw up, even though I think that would have made me feel better. Luckily I had a charcoal tablet that helped ease the toxins. Who knows what I would have been like without it.

This all sucks because now my body feels sick. I’m fairly weak and have no energy. I wanted to get a work out in today but am afraid I’m going to have to sit it out. All this with the run looming Saturday. I tell you nothing ever goes my way. Hmph!

So after nothing solid to eat in almost 24 hours I was able to stand eating a few forkfuls of salad and a grande vanilla bean frap. Something else great is that I get to go home in less than an hour.

Tuesday – CrossFit
Don’t remember, something evil though.

Wednesday – CrossFit
Push shoulder presses
Dumbbell swing
Renegade row
Lunge in place
3 sprints

Thursday – CrossFit
150 squats w/ 30lb bar on shoulders
800 m jog
25 squats w/ 30lb bar
25 squats w/ 15lb bar
This workout really made me want to cry, like really shed tears and stuff. This was no easy workout.

Saturday – Chantry Flats
We did Hoegee’s Loop and it took me 1:15. I felt great for the exception of the fall I took towards the end. Oh and also when my ankle slightly twisted, that wasn’t good either. Someone always gets hurt on this trial.

I also went to my parents’ afterwards and took my dog for a light jog. Poor thing is out of shape. She was so excited to get out and jog a bit but by the end she was done. I really miss our runs together. She really keeps me on track. I miss her dearly and can’t wait till we can have her back at our place.

Something else that has been on my mind is this damn Mt. Wilson run. I’m seriously annoyed. I mean not at anyone associated with it but just annoyed in general. I want it to be done and over with already. I’ve been training hard and am both physically and mentally exhausted. At this point I could care less about it, seriously. It may just be me and my shitty mood but I’m done. Sunday can’t come soon enough that’s for sure…

Here are some other issues I have, all in order.
Annoyed with -

1. unreturned calls/ e-mails
2. nutrition
3. myself
4. work
5. (%$^*(%#)